15 Insane Obsessions You Never Knew Existed

15. Xylophilia

Euphemistically speaking, a sexual attraction to “wood” is a common fetish that afflicts billions of people all around the world every day. Thing is, the wood that we’re talking about here refers to actual, natural forest wood. That’s right — xylophilia is the arousal to non-euphemistic wood. Not to be confused with ylophilia, which is the arousal to the forest itself, xylophiliacs have a keen appreciation for wood in a way that non-xylophiliacs can’t really fathom (nor do we really intend to). Like everyone else, xylophiliacs are varied in their sexual preferences; some are oak-people, others are pine purists. Regardless of what rocks their wooden little boat, we would advise all xylophiliacs to take some cautionary measures in preventing splinters from populating their nether regions. It’s 2016 and all, and we’re all for niche expressions of sexuality, but we’re also devoted lobbyists for Safety First, all across the board.
15. Xylophilia